The Magical Story of Us

EP 4 - The Magical Journey Overview (Part 4 - Bali Initiation & Trusting the Unknown)

We pick up the timeline the night we left Utah—hearts pounding, eyes puffy—after handing over not just our house but nearly everything inside it. “We walked out of that house with everything still in it and said goodbye.” From a salt-breeze cleanse at the Bonneville Salt Flats to a shady border-town dinner, we caravaned west, dropped Britton’s gongs at Spirit Camp on the NorCal coast, then muscled 18 checked bags and three kids through LAX to make our flight to Bali by a breath. There, life re-taught us how to listen. A traditional Joglo, flying termite swarms at sunset, gecko poop “on schedule,” monsoon thunder that scared our toddler, black-sand beaches, and a month-long Yoga Teacher Training became our rite of passage. “It was an initiation and we did not know what we were getting into, but we made it through.”
We explored the island as spiritual seekers—sacred springs, river-meets-sea offerings under a full moon, and worldschooling in village life—while also wrestling with Bali Belly, parasites, and the realization that Bali wasn’t home. A clear omen sealed it in a bamboo treehouse at Christmas: this chapter was medicine, not destination. As soon as we surrendered that, the next timeline snapped into place—Carolee’s long-spoken vow to spend her 40th in France, and then (as if plucked straight from Britton’s prayer the night before) an Instagram invite to a two-week spiritual pilgrimage in Egypt with private temple rituals. We met the guide for tea in Bali and said yes. By the time we left the island, we’d shed 12 bags (18 → 6) and a thousand assumptions. The lesson we keep living: “you can travel in the unknown and be led totally.”
Other things we talked about
Selling the house fully furnished and the surreal drive-away moment
Salt Flats “aura cleanse” send-off
Reno misfire: spider-infested rental and sketchy first night
NorCal Spirit Camp, leaving gongs in the chapel, future full-circle story
LAX logistics madness; stashing cars on the roof, family rescue ops from Vegas/Utah
Jukalo life: termite swarms, gecko routines, jungle soundscapes, sleeping under nets
Bali on Beach, healing-waters lore, water temple in Ubud
Canggu’s intensity (traffic, air), learning island travel timing
Kids’ worldschooling, Wild Child Bali (circus arts), parkour & aerials
Monkey Forest scare; another day, a rideshare full of baby spiders
Favorite eats (Mudra in Ubud) and $5–$7 massages
Key Highlights[00:00] Leaving Utah & selling the home fully furnished[05:45] Salt Flats stop → on to Spirit Camp (NorCal)[10:23] Gongs entrusted at the chapel; NorCal drop-in[11:04] LAX chaos, cars left on the roof, ticket issues[15:37] Joglo reality check: flying termites at sunset[17:16] One-month YTT: Bhagavad Gita, daily practice, black-sand beach[20:09] River-meets-ocean offering; waters of healing[24:48] Island scouting with kids; deciding Bali isn’t home[27:57] Bamboo treehouse omen at Christmas; kids’ 5-day camp[35:58] Re-calling the Paris 40th manifestation[40:40] Egypt pilgrimage ad appears; meet the guide in Bali[49:54] Monkey Forest scare; baby-spider taxi exit[51:39] Radical downsizing: 18 bags → 6, clarity for the road ahead

EP 3 - The Magical Journey Overview (Part 3 - Selling It All & Preparing for Departure)

In this next chapter of our Magical Journey overview, we step into one of the most pivotal and transformational seasons of our lives: the moment we truly chose into each other and into the unknown. This episode captures the intensity of reclaiming our sovereignty, both individually and in partnership, and the radical shifts that followed as we let go of everything we thought we needed to hold on to.
We talk about how fear showed up at every single threshold—from drinking wine for the first time as ex-Mormons, to healing sexual trauma, to opening to sovereign choices in sex, travel, and motherhood. Carolee shares how terrifying it was to confront her programming: “I thought if I touched my erotic energy, I would lose my soul.” And yet, walking into those fears became the key to our liberation.
This episode dives into our blood moon union ceremony, the sacred magic that exploded from it, and the wild unfolding that followed—including joining ISTA (International School of Temple Arts), selling our home without a plan, and preparing to move our family across the world. “We cut off the vortex of everything behind us—our faith, our infidelity, our roles—and we kissed in candlelight to seal our new life.”
We talk honestly about redefining what sacred union looks like, and how the desire to explore and be free doesn’t have to mean disconnection—it can mean deeper commitment. We broke down the old marriage, burned the certificate, and made way for a true, sovereign love.
It all culminates in a powerful decision: sell everything, buy one-way tickets to Bali, and trust the unknown to catch us.
Other things we talked about:
Facing fear and judgment at every step of awakening
How Mormon teachings around Satan shaped our spiritual fear
Patriarchal blessings and fear-based programming
Alcohol, cannabis, and mushrooms as healing tools
Energetic rituals and our lunar eclipse ceremony
The shadow of embodiment: “Women who are embodied are white trash”
Meeting our Soul Tribe at ISTA
Redefining sovereignty in partnership and motherhood
Divination and the messages that helped guide our leap
Selling our home and belongings without knowing where we’d land
Helpers on our journey that we mention:@oath.oracle - Our astrologer whom we met in Egypt@cosmicsagery/@shiftyrunes - Our psychic friends that helped us many times through our journeyFollow us on IG@themagicalstoryofus@caroleebeckham@veritas.sounds
 
Key Highlights
[00:00] Recap of part two and where the journey left off[03:20] Carolee on sovereignty and fear of spiritual loss[07:06] Alcohol as early “therapy” and the fear of damnation[10:29] Patriarchal conditioning and the fear of embodiment[15:30] Britton’s unraveling of Satan, ego, and duality[24:02] Ego death and energetic purification[29:00] Our blood moon re-union ceremony and fresh start[33:00] Astrological chaos and unexpected transformation[36:14] Discovering ISTA and stepping into sexual re-education[41:39] Carolee’s breakthrough: letting go of judgment toward embodied women[47:17] Naming and rewriting limiting beliefs around erotic energy[52:15] Finally feeling seen by Soul Tribe and safe in community[55:16] Getting rejected back home and realizing we needed to leave[57:14] Divination confirms it’s time to move—without knowing where[1:04:10] A buyer appears after magical land ritual and buys everything[1:05:38] Driving off into the unknown, headed toward Bali

EP 2 - The Magical Journey Overview (Part 2 - Awakening, Infidelity Healing & Sacred Union)

In this emotionally charged and deeply revealing part two of our Magical Journey overview, we dive headfirst into the portals that cracked us open in 2022. This was the year we chose to say a full-bodied “yes” to life—what we call living the full fuck yes—and everything began to shift. From Britton leaving his career, to psychedelic initiations, to reimagining the nature of marriage, this episode lays bare what it really took to transform our union.
We talk about what happened after our first MDMA ceremony helped us decide to stay together. From there, we launched into a wild ride of surrender and expansion. Britton shares the moment he realized, “I wasn’t choosing into living my life,” and how that insight changed everything. We began to write a “yes” list—travel, yoga teacher training, healing, sacred sex—and magic followed.
We open up about the challenge and power of sexual re-education, the emotional aftermath of infidelity, and our decision to burn our original Mormon marriage certificate. The energy of 2022 asked us to tear down the constructs we’d inherited and rebuild something sovereign, honest, and spiritually aligned.
Carolee shares the haunting fear that kept her from fully opening: “If I do this, I will lose my soul.” But in choosing to move through fear instead of around it, she found her true embodiment and sovereignty. “It is through your fears that you get what you want,” became the mantra that moved her from trauma into liberation.
From our first shared mushroom initiations to our first conscious threesome, we navigated the fires of jealousy, shame, and unprocessed grief. Through it all, we discovered that honoring personal truth—no matter how terrifying—is what paves the road to real freedom and sacred union.
Other things we talked about:
The energetic crash after leaving corporate work
Bitcoin, Ethereum, and financial risk in transition
Our first intentional “yes” list and visioning exercise
Parenthood, nursing, and making space for the feminine path
Moon magic and our spiritual anchoring practices
CE5, extraterrestrial contact, and consciousness
Shadow work and trauma responses in non-monogamy
The myth of King Arthur and the crone’s riddle: “What do women want most?”
Red thread initiation and feminine spiritual leadership
Reclaiming sovereignty and the roots of the divine feminine
Key Highlights
[00:00] Recap of part one and intention for part two[03:02] Britton quits his job and enters a deep depression[07:45] Decision to live the full “fuck yes” and what that meant[10:25] Carolee responds to the financial and emotional leap[14:05] Creating the “yes” list and calling in experiences[16:00] Sexual re-education and undoing Mormon programming[21:00] Mushroom initiation and energetic reboot[23:47] Choosing to sell everything after synchronicities flood in[27:14] Realization that trauma must clear to receive the next level[31:05] Friends predict we won’t return from Bali[32:27] Bali plans fall through—spiritual bypassing exposed[36:38] Carolee’s fear of soul loss through sexual expansion[41:30] Britton’s desire to awaken embodiment meets resistance[44:36] Jillian’s message: “It is through your fears that you get what you want”[53:35] Experiencing the trauma from the other side—Britton dissociates[1:05:46] MDMA ceremony leads to deep truth: “We were never all in”[1:13:27] Planning a new marriage ceremony under the blood moon[1:15:11] Carolee’s red thread journey and sacred feminine book club[1:18:19] Myth of sovereignty and the riddle of what women want most

EP 1 - The Magical Journey Overview (Part 1 - Choosing Each Other & Leaping Into the Unknown)

In this first full-length episode, we open up and share the foundational story that brought us to where we are today—two people who chose to rebuild everything from the ground up. We walk through the earliest moments of our love story, the pressure cooker of Mormon marriage, and how infidelity shattered the illusion of perfection but cracked us open to the truth.
We talk about being raised in a system where checklist compatibility was more important than embodied truth, and how that showed up in our early years of parenting, partnership, and sexual disconnect. “There was this incompatibility in the depth of emotion and the sexual connection—and that was driving me out to find it.” That moment of honesty laid the groundwork for everything that came after.
The crash was hard. The healing was harder. We talk about the betrayal, the shame, the church’s failed attempts at spiritual support, and how we turned to plant medicine, therapy in a bottle, and eventually a deep dive into psychedelics that transformed our marriage.
We recount our first mushroom journey and the clarity it brought. We share about leaving the Mormon church, reclaiming our spirituality, and stepping into the Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine in new ways. From moon baths to magic rituals, from heartbreak to sacred sex, this episode is the deep exhale of finally saying: this is where it all began.
We speak on trauma, reconnection, and the power of MDMA-assisted healing: “We thought we were going to talk about separating—and instead we made the most beautiful love of our relationship.” What followed was the real work of healing—not just the relationship, but ourselves.
This is our rawest truth. Our magical, messy beginning.
Other things we talked about:
Meeting at a Mormon singles ward
Emotional vs physical infidelity
The role of the church and shame in our healing
Early therapy failures and codependence
Our first experiences with alcohol, cannabis, and psychedelics
Disconnection between emotional needs and sex
The power of feminine spiritual literature (Mary Magdalene Revealed)
Learning emotional intelligence and shadow integration
Our awakening through astrology and moon rituals
Our first MDMA experience and its impact on reconnection
Key Highlights
[00:00] Overview of the podcast’s purpose[01:05] How we met in a Mormon singles ward[03:02] The instant spark and beginning of our relationship[07:50] Marriage, miscarriages, and checklist compatibility[12:31] Betrayal, infidelity, and the root of disconnect[17:38] Failed church support and turning to plant medicine[20:00] Alcohol as therapy and the gateway to deeper healing[24:23] Our first mushroom journey and maternal realizations[27:18] Leaving the Mormon church for good[29:24] Carolee’s path to Divine Feminine teachings[33:02] Our spiritual journey beyond religion[37:19] Embracing witch archetypes and ancestral healing[42:52] Moon baths and emotional safety after betrayal[52:29] From moon rituals to manifestation and cosmic alignment[55:41] MDMA experience that nearly led to separation but opened our hearts[1:02:00] How plant medicine helped us find our “we” again[1:07:53] Healing is never one-sided—it’s always a mirror[1:09:54] True healing starts from within, even if the relationship ends

The Beginning of Us: Magic, Truth, and Divine Union

In our very first episode, we open the doors wide and invite you into our world—raw, real, and full of magic. This is the beginning of The Magical Story of Us, where we share not only the sacred and the sensual, but also the sticky and the shadowy. We talk about our journey from being two pretty Mormon parents into lovers, partners, and creators walking the path of divine union.
This episode sets the stage for what’s to come: conscious co-creation, infidelity and forgiveness, sacred sex, ritual magic, and the gritty truth of what it takes to love fully—including the monster parts. Britton shares, “Magic is manifestation in all of its aspects,” and we explore how ritual and intention have become the foundation of everything we now build—from homes to healing.
We speak honestly about the turning points in our relationship—how betrayal became a portal, and how holding on to our truths, even when it felt like it could end everything, actually gave birth to a new beginning. “If what I say ends everything, so be it. Now, it never ended for us.” That line sums up the wild courage it took to survive and deepen our love.
We also touch on conscious parenting, the divine third entity that is our union, and how playful kink and emotional alchemy have become tools in our toolbox. Carolee shares a powerful moment from Egypt that mirrored her own internal judgments, prompting the question: “What part of the wild woman in you are you not loving?” This podcast is about claiming it all—and loving it all.
This isn’t spa-day self-care. This is deep, gritty self-love. The kind where you meet your shadow, love your monster, and ask your partner, “Can you love this part of me too?” And when the answer is yes, everything begins to change.
Other things we talked about:
Astrology and synastry in our birth charts
Healing through plant medicine
Our spiritual evolution after Mormonism
Energy discharge and emotional alchemy in relationship
Parenting “star children”
The concept of the “third alternative” in relationships
Using sex and kink as conscious tools for transformation
Political polarization and 4D consciousness
Our foundational pillars: magic, ritual, play, and the cosmic clock
Key Highlights
[00:00] Why we’re creating this podcast—what it’s all about[01:16] Taboo topics, sex, and divine union[02:10] Our approach to magic and ritual as manifestation[06:11] Sexual playfulness and conscious kink in our relationship[07:42] Our background in Mormonism and what cracked it open[09:33] The infidelity that broke and rebirthed us[12:52] Discovering the “third alternative” in divine union[14:22] The death of the not-self and becoming the “we”[20:02] Emotional alchemy and playful discharge instead of disconnection[25:06] Carolee’s Egypt story and loving the “unfinished” self[27:22] Britton on self-love as the heart of awakening[31:19] The real meaning of self-love: “Can you love the monster in you?”